pengikut comel

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

saye suke awak. :)

macam mana aku boleh suka dia oi! macam mana! :( tak kira la dia sapa. yg penting aku saja yang tau!! 

kenapa dia. haha. hati terjatuh masa mula tengok mata dia. hati terjatuh and buat aku nak cari sapa dia and esok tu aku turun bawah lagi cari dia. but dia x dak. okay! and jumpa lagi sekali. aku dapat num fon dia walaupun bukan aku yang mintak!. 

masa orang tu tanya aku , aku suka dia ka x,aku saja jawab tak sebab aku sendiri confuse ngan diri aku sendiri. but now, no! aku suka dia kot! :( haih. mcm mana aku nak buat ni. memang hati aku kecewa. yang aku cari bukan pengganti detu . tapi orang yg boleh buat aku lupa sapa AFJ! and aku penah cakap, kalau dia berjaya buat aku lupa AFJ and buat aku jatuh kat dia, then aku akan terima dia. aku akan jaga dia mcm aku jaga detu dulu. but more than that i guess. :) tapi tapi! aku lupa! dia dah berpunya! selalu aku lupa semua tu. :'( 

sedih tau! sedih! baru kali ni aku rasa betul2 ikhlas. baru kali ni aku rasa aku betul2 termakan dengan kata-kata sendiri. :( eh awk, sy suka awak la! betol ! kali ni serius. saya x main2. :( tapi tapi! tapi takpela. saye x nak ganggu hak orang lain. :) so biar saya simpan perasaan ni sorang-sorang. :) sebab kalau saya suka pon saya simpan dalam hati je. :) *pastu aku sendiri sakit hati tanggung sorang2. :( bai! :'(


Sunday, April 22, 2012

if ever..

mood : swing + letih 
lagu : what's make u beautiful 
lokasi : office bukan abah aku punya. 

if ever.. perkataan tu pendek ja. tapi banyak yang boleh di elaborate mengenai ayat tu.  

jika nanti , ada yang terluka dengan apa yang aku katakan, apa yang aku lakukan, jadi maafkanlah aku. aku bukan manusia sempurna sepertimana yang diingini. :) 

jika ada sesuatu yang aku lakukan menimbulkan rasa sayang mahupon benci dan jika aku tak mampu memberikan yang terbaik maka beritahulah aku. sebab aku selalunya terlupa apa yang aku x penah sedar aku lakukan. 

dan yang paling penting, 

jika ada lelaki yang mampu menjaga aku lagi, yang mampu membuatkan aku tersenyum lagi setiap saat dalam hari-hariku, sepertimana apa yang aku rasakan selama ini, maka apabila kau muncul lagi dalam hidupku, aku akan berjanji, aku akan sedaya upaya menjaga mu , hatimu dan semuanya agar kau tak terasa luka yang aku rasakan. :) dan apabila kau hanya hadir untuk mengecewakan hatiku sepertimana apa yang aku rasakan dari mereka yang aku sayang sepenuhnya, maka dari mula kau tolak lah aku sebelum sempat aku jatuh cinta. dan jika hadirmu ikhlas untuk membahagiakan aku, maka aku berharap agar kau tak mensia-siakan aku. kerana hati aku hanya satu. dan x pernah terbahagi menjadi dua mahupun tiga. dan apabila terlihat dihadapanku manusia yang layak aku menjaga hatinya, maka aku akan berikan bahagia yang aku sendiri perlukan. dan jika sayang ku melemaskan mu, maka pergilah sejauhnya agar aku tak dapat mencarimu lagi. kerana luka hati masih ada. hancur hati masih tak terubat. jika hadirmu nanti akan menambahkan duka, maka aku pohon kepadaMu Ya Allah, jauhkanlah dia dariku seperti mana kau jauhkan  insan yang aku sayang. dan jika benar masih ada lagi hati aku kepadanya walhal dia sebaliknya, maka kau berikanlah yang terbaik buatku wahai Tuhan. perginya dia , aku redha. dan aku tau dia x kan kembali seperti dulu. sebab apa yang menjadi hakMu yang kau berikan buatku, telah kau tarik dari dirinya walaupun sebuah persahabatan yang aku kekalkan selama ini. :) 

dan bila aku menyukainya tetapi dia menolak. maka aku diamkan diri. :) pergilah, dan datanglah bila kau bersedia. :) 

dan jika dia adalah untukku maka kau berikanlah kami peluang bersama melalui izinMu ya Allah. jika dia bukan untukku, seperti biasa kau hilangkan lah perasaan ini. :) 

Monday, April 16, 2012

Sunday, April 15, 2012

once upon a time, an angel and a devil fell in love.

  • and how i miss someone to hold, when hope begins to fade. 
  •  you're alone because you push people away. and someday nobody gonna bother coming back.
  • what was 'whole' is now a 'hole' 
  • love is not a maybe thing 
  • u there to finish me off, sweetheart? 
  • i dont care for what u say, so dont even speak. 
  • best friends, playing around, lovers, strangers. 
  • that's why i don't get close to people anymore, coz what you do when you're gone.  


Friday, April 13, 2012

life plan

:) 

smiling. thats the main plan. and then :-


  •  continue my degree. banyak tahun dah terbuang. 
  • naik pangkat. 
  • a car is needed. before this year ends
  • a house , pebesaq umah ka. :D
  • weight lose. now pon dah lose. :) 
  • change my personalities. :) 
  • married? errrr maybe not. 
  • boyfie on 24. 
  • modelling. 
thats all. :) u know, moneys come and go. people change. and so do i. people change. haha. and ive trust nobody. moneys come moneys go, what to wasted? nothing. i got everything that people wants. moneys, families, great job, great friends, all people around me loves me, a love that doesnt exist. maybe not yet.maybe one day i could get one. enough chasing. let it comes . himself. God knows what best for me. enough if he can appreciate me. nothing else matter. appreciation is needed. and i deserve that way. as i appreciate people that i love. nothing can stop me doing that thing. thats why i dont mind spent almost everything that i had in my hand, moneys, time, just to people that need me most in their life. but somehow, i believe, there will always someone or two will take advantage in everything that i do. for those who are keep blaming me in everything,  chance are everywhere u know. if u dont give it, maybe i will give it to myself. i will change myself. u dont have to push me that way. times take place in everything. karma get me by now. and i've learn my lesson. nothing's best to be in a mothers arm. nothings great to get her forgiveness. knowing that u losing so many people that u love before, teach me how to care of them. but i do mistakes. people do mistakes by mistakes. nothing perfect. im just a person that has been created by Allah , not in a perfect way. but to regret everything that happend, i just do it now. :) losing one and only friend that u count on the most, it teach me, today people will say they love you, and tomorrow they will hate you for a mistake. losing a person that always be with me also about my only mistake, or maybe about many mistake that I DIDNT REALIZE , teach me to talk loud, ask urself a chance to explain everything before its too late. even though , nobody wants to listen it. even though they dont ask for it. :) only mad people , will be mad with others with no reason. :) and im not mad. :D 

rejection is not something cool to do. u know who u are when u read or if u read this. a rite to be a woman is not to let herself be fool by a man. even though a man are the person who will take her to be care someday. the thing that you do, make my respect on you gone just like that . ur way kiss my forehead without my permission, its too much. ur JUST my FRIEND. not more than that. u cross the line dude. thats not how a friend treat his friend. and using u? no i am not. hating you? also its a no. losing a respect on you. yes i am. i admit it. ive change suddenly. i didnt talk to you the way i did before. because im not a fool that doesnt see about people. and yes! im angry with you. because that using u thing, its not in my intention dude. its better i let u go not to be my friend anymore. 

thats all for today. bai. :D